Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Nerves

            I'm pretty much thinking out loud here, along with over thinking things entirely.

   I had one of those dreams nightmares last night were you're in a race and no matter how hard you try you legs don't want to move.   I used to have these a lot while racing every weekend in HS/ College.  I hadn't had one in a while because I'd stopped racing and only started entering races again a few months ago.  I forgot how awful those nightmares are.  Have any of you had these kind of nightmares where you're racing, but your legs refuse to move?

      It is safe to say this race has been occupying a large part of my mind the past few days and I am straight up scared about it.   I am definitely questioning why I thought it was such a brilliant idea to put myself through 10 minutes of leg burning, lung bursting pain (the first minute is all adrenaline and fresh legs and optimism).  If I want any sort of decent time, I'm going to have to make it hurt like hell.  and it is freaking me out.


    Physically I think it is in me, I have the speed to run a sub 6 mile and the endurance to run 13+, so I should be able to put together 2- 6 minute miles (and actually 200m less than 2 miles), but if I can't mentally gut it out I have no shot.

    Bottom line: It is going to hurt. A lot.  Why did I think this was a good idea??
 and at the same time I am very excited about it and thinking it was a GREAT idea :)


    I'm, at least, feeling ready-ish. Most of the weekend weight is gone and no alcohol since Saturday night.  I ran three miles with some speed work mixed in yesterday.  Today I will do a little shake out run and some strides after.  And I know that despite training not being as planned out as HS, I am very much fitter than I was back then.

   Yesterday I took out my old "Once a Runner" book.  If you have not read it yet: Drop everything you're doing and go get it!!  :D  It is more of a track book I guess, the main character is a miler, but most runners can relate to the overall mindset.


  My favorite quote from the book:
"... Or we can blaze! Become legends in our own time, strike fear in the heart of mediocre talent everywhere! We can scald dogs, put records out of reach! Make the stands gasp as we blow into an unearthly kick from three hundred yards out! We can become God's own messengers delivering the dreaded scrolls! We can race dark Satan himself till he wheezes fiery cinders down the back straightaway....They'll speak our names in hushed tones, 'those guys are animals' they'll say! We can lay it on the line, bust a gut, show them a clean pair of heels. We can sprint the turn on a spring breeze and feel the winter leave our feet! We can, by God, let our demons loose and just wail on!" 


     Race Outfit post to come tomorrow :)

    And I bought a Garmin 405.  It was totally impulsive and semi alcohol influenced.  I ordered it online, from my phone, while at the Isles game. (It was on sale!).  It should be here this week :D

21 comments:

Julie said...

I always have those non working leg dreams before vacation and in my dream I suddenly realize that I haven't packed a bag and I'm late getting to the airport and my legs won't work to get me there, and once I'm there, they move so slow and I can't get to the right gate.

Maybe that means I need to take more vacations so I'll quit having these dreams :-)

You are going to rock your race speedy girl!!

Chad said...

I have that same dream a LOT. It's like my legs are in quicksand or something thick.
I have a Garmin 405, I can't imagine life without it. Enjoy your new toy.

Tri-James said...

A little bit of fear is a good thing. And yes, it will hurt.

You signed up for the race to prove to yourself that you can do it.

Matty O said...

I have never been afraid of the pain, only the injuries that come with pushing my body to it's limits.

The Sean said...

Great book. The main character focuses on what he can achieve. The 400s in the moonlight had everything to do with being relaxed and allowing the run to happen and nothing to do with anxiety. Find your optimal tension and go out and experience the joy of the run!!

Andrew Opala said...

You're just sandbagging it!

You are going to KNOCK THE LIVING SHIT out of this run!

Don't second guess yourself. You are a rocket ready to launch into greatness.

Ready, Set, Take it!!!!!

Melissa Cunningham said...

YUP,i have those dreams as well!!!
just the mind trying to filter out thoughts of being unprepared...
you will ROCK this upcoming race!

Kurt @ Becoming An Ironman said...

I admit I've never had that kind of dream. My nervous dreams are much more along the lines of getting to the race and realizing you forgot your shorts, a shirt, and my race shoes so I have to run in jeans, cotton socks, and casual shoes. haha

Since you're just getting back into it, I'd say you're completely normal. But you really are going to kill it!

At my first 5k EVER, I ran two uphill 6:15 miles (much faster than I expected) and then finished with a 5:54 third mile. WOW did that hurt, but man did I feel alive out there! 'Embrace the pain and you'll learn to love it' I always say.

Best of luck!

Rose said...

It's going to hurt DURING, yeah, but remember how AWESOME you will feel afterward, and for years to come.

Run with Jess said...

The closer I get to raceday, the more dreams I have like that!!
Gotta get that book... been on my list way too long.

Kovas said...

Again to Carthage, the sequel to Once a Runner, is about them moving up to the marathon, also a really good book.

Stefanie D. said...

Totally jealous of your Garmin 405!I am saving my pennies for one. :D I'm pretty sure you are going to do great!

Caroline said...

I have bad dreams before races I dream that I cannot find the finish line !

Nelly said...

I'm with Matty O above - the main thing that I worry about is getting injured pushing myself to the limit (especially something short and intense like 3000 meters). But it seems like your body is ready for that kind of speed.

I'm not sure if I've had a quicksand dream, but in real life I had that happen at the end of my only marathon - my mind wanted to go, but my legs wouldn't respond, haha Most bizarre feeling I've ever had while running, haha

Sometimes the hardest part about doing races that short is the mental part - you know you're putting your body through hell! But it is short, so just give it all you've got.

I think you will do great, I bet you will beat your high school time. Make sure to do a long warmup before the race - I'd almost suggest a mile or more, so that you are ready to blast away at max heartrate when the gun goes off...good luck!

Nelly said...

and awesome on the garmin 405! not sure if you had a gps before, but you will love it! I have a 305 and love all the data it gives me. My 4 data fields are - heartrate, distance, current pace and total time. I know everyone has different preferences on what they want to see. You will love tracking your heartrate every day and see it drop as you gradually get more fit!

Doug said...

I keep thinking about getting a Garmin, too. Can't wait to hear about it.

LifeasKristina said...

I love my garmin-so mad I forgot it for this trip, i'll be running the beach with no idea how long I went, beyond my usual pace! I'm completely impulsive, add alcohol and it's going to be a bad AMEX bill.

RoseRunner said...

listen, no joke, I have never had a running nightmare about a race before until LAST NIGHT. Weird!

In the dream, I was juiced at the starting line of a marathon. When I shot off, I looked down and saw I was wearing SOCCER CLEATS. I spazzed. Then, I got majorly lost on the twisty play-house route and had to drop out.

coach dion said...

Can I talk like a Coach? Thank you, here goes:

3000m is a great distance to get back into running track, it's not fast and scary like a 1500m or 800m and it's a lot shorter than 5000m.

Last night I had the guys running 1km reps fast... Yes I was running as well, I went out hard and was really hurting and died at the end. For the 2nd one I didn't go out that hard, but was able to hold it together and finished with a faster time... (only managed one more)

What I'm saying is that 1st lap is so important, get it right and the legs will fly.
Good luck

Chris K said...

Yeah, everything above. Actually, I didn't read it. Okay, here is my unsolicited advice: Relax. You will run better if you are relaxed.

Now let's get onto the important thing, race outfit. Does it start with a b and and end with a ikini?

Mike said...

I've had the nightmare, but not before a race.